WCH Weekend Preview

Thursday Night Pre-Game Movie: Sudden Death. Arguably the worst thing to come out of the 1994 NHL Lockout. This movie would have been far more realistic if Chris Tamer had killed all the terrorists with his bare hands, and then in the dramatic final scene, fought Jean-Claude Van Damme, in a re-enactment of his classic fight with Jim Cummins.

Friday Afternoon Pre-Game Song: Quicksand by Finger Eleven. I think Finger Eleven has one of the three songs that are currently being played on the radio and it is absolutely brutal. This is a reminder that they didn't always suck.

Games I'd Want to See If I Had Unlimited Funds: Ferris State at Bowling Green. Ferris and BG are tied for 6th in the CCHA. Both teams have been much better than expected this year, and this should be an entertaining series.

Controversial Play That a WCHA Official Will Probably Screw-Up: Technically Marco Hunt followed protocol by not jumping into the Radke/Vossberg fight, but since we've now learned that he wouldn't know a fight if he saw it, he may as well have jumped in there and helped Vossberg out.

Also, from this week's INCH Chat:

"[WCHA commissioner Bruce] McLeod said his bigger concern is a general atmosphere of coaches, players and fans rhetoric toward the officials heating up...

I wonder what created such an atmosphere?

Picks to Click
Forward: Andreas Nodl, St. Cloud
Defense: Eddie Del Grosso, Nebraska-Omaha
Goalie: Richard Bachman, Colorado College
Apples to Apples Card: Canada

Something to Watch on Saturday Afternoon: Somebody archived most of the CCHA All-Access shows hosted by Mike Kosta.

Cheapshot at the Fine City of St. Cloud: This isn't really a cheap shot, but St. Cloud has to have the most casual PA announcer in the league. Chuck is a like a regular PA announcer after about 3 drinks. My only real complaint is when he does his patented 'Woo' after every goal of like a 8-7 game at the national Select Festivals.

Pre/Post-Game Meal of the Week: Taco Bell. You have to admire a place that makes everything out of the same five ingredients, yet still manages to change menu items like every two months.

Arena Food of the Week: Taco in a Bag. Taco in a Bag is the Northerners answer to Frito Pie. It's basically taco meat and crumbled Dorito's in a bag. They serve it in Bemidji. I'm not sure if it's served at any other college hockey venues. I feel the same way about this as Patton Oswalt feels about the KFC Famous Bowl.

Wisdom of Michael Scott: "This is an old adage, but they say when you find true love, you know within the first 24 hours. With Carol, I knew within the first 24 minutes of the second day I met her."

Predictions For You Compulsive Gambling-Types That Have to Bet

Obligatory MZone Baby.

Gambletron 2000's Pick of the Week: Friday Night- Wisconsin 301 Minnesota 0

Smooth Jimmy Apollo's 52% Lock of the Week: Saturday Night Miami 5 Western Michigan 2

The George Costanza Special(A prediction that is the exact opposite of every instinct and inclination I have): Ohio State sweeps Notre Dame

WCH Weekend Preview

Thursday Night Pre-Game Movie: Rounders. This was an excellent movie made before it's time, even if some of the poker stuff doesn't make a lot of sense. It boggles my mind that in an era where Hollywood will make a sequel out of anything, there was never a sequel to this movie, when it seemed perfectly set-up for one.

Friday Afternoon Pre-Game Song:Bleed It Out by Linkin Park. Quite a few teams have this song on their warm-up tape.

Games I'd Want to See If I Had Unlimited Funds: Lake Superior at Western Michigan? Yeah right. I'm offended that I would even ask myself this question. Obviously I've gotta go with #1 vs. #2. Also, it's Winter Carnival at Michigan Tech, so that would probably be pretty fun.

Controversial Play That a WCHA Official Will Probably Screw-Up: I'm sure there will be many to choose from, but I think we've all learned a valuable lesson on the wrong way to react to said mistakes.

Cliche Arena Song of the Week: Shout by the Isley Brothers. Especially appropriate for college hockey since every arena has their own Bluto. You know the guy that I'm talking about.

Picks to Click
It was pointed out to me last weekend how much I nailed the Olthuis pick last week.

Forward: Chad Kolarik, Michigan
Defense: Ryan McDonagh, Wisconsin
Goalie: Jordan Pearce, Notre Dame

Something to Watch on Saturday Afternoon: Human Tetris. It was always my dream to have a Tetris piece named after me. I tried for the little T one, but it never caught on.

Cheapshot at the Fine City of St. Cloud: Going to a game in St. Cloud is like going to a show in Branson, Missouri. You're guaranteed to be on camera at least once. I'm sorry, but I'm there for hockey. I don't need to see a bunch of Polaris jackets kissing or "doing the dance".

Pre/Post-Game Meal of the Week: Applebees. This is a particularly popular post-game stop. Probably because it's one of the few establishments in Minnesota that dares stay open past 9:30.


Arena Food of the Week: Ice Cream. You'd think that when it's -300 degrees outside in Duluth, people wouldn't immediately flock to a frozen treat, but I swear every person in that arena buys ice cream.

Wisdom of Michael Scott:"Wikipedia is the best thing ever. Anyone in the world can write anything they want about any subject, so you know you are getting the best possible information"

Predictions For You Compulsive Gambling-Types That Have to Bet

Gambletron 2000's Pick of the Week: Friday Night- Denver 39 Minnesota 0

Smooth Jimmy Apollo's 52% Lock of the Week: Saturday Night Colorado College 5 St. Cloud 3

The George Costanza Special(A prediction that is the exact opposite of every instinct and inclination I have): Alaska sweeps Bowling Green

WCH Weekend Preview

Thursday Night Pre-Game Movie: Friday. Great movie. I think this was the last movie targeted at an African-American audience that didn't involve dance-offs, fat people, or people acting dumb at a barbershop, barbeque, airplane, etc, which is a real shame.

Friday Afternoon Pre-Game Song: No One Knows by Queens of the Stone Age. You wouldn't know it if you just listen to the song, but this is seriously the hardest song to play on Guitar Hero. It should come with a warning. It starts out pretty simple and you think you're doing ok. Then the guitar solo comes in and next thing you know, you're crying in the corner of the room with a guitar jammed up your ass. It's brutal.


Games I'd Want to See If I Had Unlimited Funds: Clarkson at Colorado College. This is the WCHA's last real chance to prove conference superiority(Technically UND still has two games against Bemidji, and Minnesota State has one game against Nebraksa-Omaha). Two wins for CC would be huge, because I think the best hope for prospective at-large berth candidates is to have every ECAC team outside the top 14 of the PWR. That way, there is no concern of Clarkson getting upset in their conference tournament and the ECAC taking two NCAA tournament bids.

Controversial Play That a WCHA Official Will Probably Screw-Up: I think I'm fairly complaint-free this week.


Cliche Arena Song of the Week: "I Want to Drive the Zamboni" I'm not really sure that's the exact title, but I don't care enough to look. Who decided that strapping a small child to a slow-moving vehicle is entertainment?

Picks to Click
Forward: Jason Wiley, Minnesota State
Defense: Michael Ratchuk, Michigan State
Goalie: Jon Olthuis, Alaska-Anchorage

Something to Watch on Saturday Afternoon: Chris Berman had a promising future as a goalie while at Brown University....until players kept skating in front of his net. Jesus!

Cheapshot at the Fine City of St. Cloud: Knowing that history repeats itself, it's probably no surprise that after a shocking, and disappointing loss to a rival they felt was inferior that St. Cloud's campus would turn to national socialism. Dude, at least it's an ethos.


Pre/Post-Game Meal of the Week: Little Caesar's Hot-n-Ready pizza. I was skeptical of the whole hot-n-ready idea when it first came out, and it's true that if you happen to hit a store at a non-peak hour, you may end up with a pizza well past its life expectancy. But every Friday on my way to a game, I stop in and pick up a pizza to eat on the drive, and it's probably the best meal I eat all week.


Arena Food of the Week: Mini-donuts. I think both Minnesota and Minnesota State have added mini-donut stands this year, joining St. Cloud and the XCel Center. They're not as good as the mini-donuts at the State Fair, but still good. They're smaller than regular donuts, meaning more surface area actually gets fried.


Wisdom of Michael Scott: "Hug it out, bitch.' That is what men say to each other after a fight. They hug it out, in doing so they just let it go, and walk away, and they're done. Not a good idea to say that to a woman, however, I've found. Doesn't translate."

Predictions For You Compulsive Gambling-Types That Have to Bet


Gambletron 2000's Pick of the Week: Friday Night- North Dakota 900 Minnesota 0


Smooth Jimmy Apollo's 52% Lock of the Week: Friday Night- North Dakota 900 Minnesota 0

The George Costanza Special(A prediction that is the exact opposite of every instinct and inclination I have): Nebraska-Omaha sweeps Michigan State

WCH Weekend Preview

Thursday Night Pre-Game Movie: National Lampoon's: Pucked. Of all the movies in the world about hockey, this film is definitely.....one of them. The movie stars Jon Bon Jovi and Bud Bundy. That's about all you need to know.


Friday Afternoon Pre-Game Song: Everyday I'm Hustlin' by Rick Ross. I think Katt Williams was right. If they played this song in grocery stores, I would buy everything in the store.

Games I'd Want to See If I Had Unlimited Funds: Minnesota at Wisconsin. Even if both teams aren't their strongest this year, both teams are definitely going to bring it for this series, which should make for some very entertaining hockey. Also, an 8-point swing last weekend(BG's sweep, ND's getting swept), made this weekends series between Bowling Green and Notre Dame a lot more interesting. A nice weekend by the pesky Falcons could upset the CCHA's "Big Four, Non-existant Eight" paradigm.


Controversial Play That a WCHA Official Will Probably Screw-Up: There's a WCHA ref suspended this weekend. In the words of Barry Zuckerkorn, "It's never the ones you hope."


Cliche Arena Song of the Week: Three Blind Mice. I think a big reason why the NCAA moved to a two-ref system is so they didn't have to hear this song any more.


Picks to Click
Forward: Andy Miele, Miami
Defense: Chay Genoway, North Dakota
Goalie: Shane Connelly, Wisconsin
Apples to Apples Card: Deer Hunting


Something to Watch on Saturday Afternoon: Is $10,000 worth humiliating yourself by opening for the world's worst blogger? I always thought Margaret Cho wouldn't have a career in comedy if she wasn't Asian and a woman. Now I don't know what to think.


Pre/Post-Game Meal of the Week: Food Network's Guy Fieri recently profiled Blimpy's in Ann Arbor. Alas, nobody went with the fried egg on their burger and a little piece of me died.


Arena Food of the Week: Forest Lake's Maroon and Gold Arena, notoriously one of the Twin Cities' coldest rinks, serves Cup o'Noodles at their concession stand.

Wisdom of Michael Scott: "I'm an early bird... And, I'm a night owl. So I'm wise, and, I have worms."


Predictions For You Compulsive Gambling-Types That Have to Bet

I think there can only be one prediction this week. Take it away, MZone Baby.

In Rod We Trust

(Everyone else got to use that headline and I felt left out)

Credit to MGoBlog for breaking this huge story: new Michigan football coach Rich Rodriguez is probably playing Score-O tonight at Michigan's hockey game against Western.(For those who know Score-O by a different name, it's the game where you shoot from center ice and try to put the puck through the little hole in the board).

This has the potential to be pretty interesting, since I'm fairly confident Rodriguez has never actually attended a hockey game before. Rodriguez did meet with Red Berenson shortly after he was hired, though his first, and only, question to Red about college hockey was whether or not players were allowed to fight.

Suffice to say, I'm fairly confident we'll see some board-lifting from the Yost staffers tonight, assuming Rodriguez can get the puck anywhere near the net. The good news is that if he gets the $50 for winning, that money can go towards paying his buyout to West Virginia.

WCH Weekend Preview

It's Important Because I'm Involved: I was this week's guest for The Gauntlet over at RWD. It's long, so good luck reading it. Also, I can only assume that post got a 'Hotties' tag because I was involved.

Thursday Night Pre-Game Movie: Mallrats. "Breakfast, shmreakfast. Look at the score, for Christ's sake. It's only the second period and I'm up 12 to 2. Breakfasts come and go, Rene, but Hartford, "the Whale," they only beat Vancouver once, maybe twice in a lifetime." That's the greatest monologue about the game of hockey ever written.

Friday Afternoon Pre-Game Song: Sudbury Saturday Night by Stompin' Tom Connors. In honor of Canada's recent World Juniors gold medal.

Games I'd Want to See If I Had Unlimited Funds: St. Cloud's home and home series with Minnesota. I almost picked Notre Dame's home and home series with Michigan State, but I'm not as much of a fan of Sunday hockey. Plus, who could pass up the opportunity to see people throw stuff at Gopher players and fans?


Controversial Play That a WCHA Official Will Probably Screw-Up: It's the first full slate of the second half of the year in the WCHA. In a normal year, the intensity really gets turned up in the second half of the year. This year, with everyone sitting at about the .500 mark, it should be even crazier. I'm fairly confident we'll see at least one fight somewhere this weekend.


Cliche Arena Song of the Week: Louie, Louie Unintelligble at any speed, especially when played by certain pep bands.

Picks to Click
Last Week: Ryan Duncan was WCHA Offensive Player of the Week. I think I deserve at least half credit for that.

Forward: Brock Trotter, Denver
Defense: Tyler Eckforad, Alaska
Goalie: Jordan Pearch, Notre Dame
Apples to Apples Card: Charging Rhinos

Something to Watch on Saturday Afternoon: Zach Galifianakis Interviews Michael Cera.

Pre/Post-Game Meal of the Week: BTB Burrito in Ann Arbor(or East Lansing, for the younger siblings out there). By far the leader in the take-out burrito industry. Plus, the guy that works the cash register at the Ann Arbor location is like some kind of crazy Burrito Wizard.


Arena Food of the Week: A couple weeks ago, I was at a high school rink, and the concession stand offered hot apple cider. Both liking cider, and looking for a change of pace, I decided to try it. Unbeknownst to me, there is apparently such a thing as hot apple cider mix that is poured into hot water. It was awful. It was like drinking an apple Jolly Rancher, which may sound interesting, but it gets old really quickly.

Wisdom of Michael Scott:"And, even though we're still a family here at Dunder-Mifflin, families grow. And, at some point, the daddy can't take a bath with the kids anymore. I am upper management, and it would be inappropriate for me to take a bath with Pam, as much as I might want to."


Predictions For You Compulsive Gambling-Types That Have to Bet

Gambletron 2000's Pick of the Week: Friday Night- St. Cloud 684 Minnesota 0

Smooth Jimmy Apollo's 52% Lock of the Week: Saturday Night- Sunday- Notre Dame 3 Michigan State 2

The George Costanza Special(A prediction that is the exact opposite of every instinct and inclination I have): Miami sweeps Nebraska-Omaha

WCH Weekend Preview

Thursday Night Pre-Game Movie: Demolition Man. Everything about this movie is a terrible idea(other than letting Denis Leary say whatever he wants), and yet it's utterly enjoyable to watch.

Friday Afternoon Pre-Game Song: The Denial Twist by the White Stripes. The music video for this song was directed by Michel Gondry and involves Conan O'Brien, which is pretty awesome.

Also, the USHL's leading scorer, Andy Miele, looks like he will be playing for Miami soon. Miele played high school hockey in Michigan for Grosse Pointe North High School, the same school that White Stripes drummer Meg White attended.

Games I'd Want to See If I Had Unlimited Funds: That US/Canada World Juniors game looks pretty interesting.

Controversial Play That a WCHA Official Will Probably Screw-Up: They'll miss something because they'll be too busy collecting their royalty checks from Subway.


Cliche Arena Song of the Week: Cotton-Eyed Joe. A folk song more than a century half old that was absolutely murdered in 1994 by a band named Rednex(not surprising), who hailed from Sweden(very surprising). Here's the music video. If you make it past the half-way point of the video, you're not human. One of the theories for the meaning of the term "cotton-eyed" is that a person's eyes would become milky white as a result of having syphilis.

(This is the point where Carnac the Great puts the envelope up to his head, says "Cotton-Eyed Joe, Rednecks, and STDs" and then opens the envelope and reads a slip of paper that says, "Name three things found on St. Cloud State's campus.")*


Picks to Click

Forward: Ryan Duncan, North Dakota
Defense: Johann Kroll, Ohio State
Goalie: Alex Stalock, Minnesota-Duluth
Apples to Apples Card: Giant Squid


Pre/Post-Game Meal of the Week: After a rough illness this week, food is the last thing I've wanted to think about.

Arena Food of the Week: Ditto.

Wisdom of Michael Scott:"Guess what? I have flaws. What are they? Oh I don’t know. I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally, I’ll hit somebody with my car. So sue me. No, don’t sue me. That’s the opposite of the point that I’m trying to make."


Predictions For You Compulsive Gambling-Types That Have to Bet


Gambletron 2000's Pick of the Week: Friday Night- Wayne State 284 Minnesota 0

Smooth Jimmy Apollo's 52% Lock of the Week: Saturday Night- Michigan Tech 2 Mercyhurst 1

The George Costanza Special(A prediction that is the exact opposite of every instinct and inclination I have): North Dakota's series with St. Cloud won't end with a split.









*Just kidding**
**Mostly

WCH Weekend Preview

Thursday Night Pre-Game Movie: Hudsucker Proxy. Does this count as a holiday movie? Maybe? Kinda sorta? I don't know. At any rate, it's a good flick.

Friday Afternoon Pre-Game Song: Would? by Alice in Chains. For a song that came out 15 years ago, it still gets a lot of play on Twin Cities radio. They're like the Sheryl Crow of alternative rock.

Games I'd Want to See If I Had Unlimited Funds: Colorado College at St. Cloud. But really only for the morbid fascination to see what can go wrong next for St. Cloud.

Controversial Play That a WCHA Official Will Probably Screw-Up: The sky is the limit. WCHA officials care about goaltender interference like George Bush cares about black people.

Cliche Arena Song of the Week:: Smoke on the Water. It's good to know that there are a still few heroes out there than can play this song on a fake guitar.

Picks to Click
Last week: Ryan Jones had a hat trick. The rest is mere trivia

Forward: Tyler Bozak, Denver
Defenseman: Jack Hillen, Colorado College
Goalie: Michael-Lee Teslak, Michigan Tech


Pre/Post-Game Meal of the Week: Pizza Hut Double Deep Pizza. I heartily endorse this event or product.

Arena Food of the Week: Jelly Beans. Not the gross gigantic ones either. I mean the gourmet stuff with the weird flavors. Technically you have to smuggle these in, but they're far superior to any arena concession candy. I'm pretty sure whoever came up with the idea of a popcorn-flavored jelly bean should have won a Nobel Prize. I used to really like the Haribo gummy bears, until I found out they were made by Nazis. Though to be honest, I always suspected it. Who else would put those disgusting yellow gummy bears in there?

Wisdom of Michael Scott: "Cage matches? Yeah, they work. How could they not work? If they didn't work, everybody would still be in the cage"

Predictions For You Compulsive Gambling-Types That Have to Bet

Gambletron 2000's Pick of the Week: Under-18 Team 300 Minnesota-Duluth 0

Smooth Jimmy Apollo's 52% Lock of the Week: Saturday Night: Denver 3 Alaska-Anchorage 2

The George Costanza Special(A prediction that is the exact opposite of every instinct and inclination I have): Ohio State sweeps Alaska

WCH Weekend Preview

Thursday Night Pre-Game Movie: Unaccompanied Minors. I'm a huge fan of the radio show This American Life and this film is based off of a TAL story. Plus, there are some very funny people in the movie.

Friday Afternoon Pre-Game Song: Tainted Love by Soft Cell. A lot of people call Soft Cell a one-hit wonder. But I think even that is a stretch, because before you get to the end of the song, you're already kind of a sick of it. They're more like a one-half hit wonder.

Games I'd Want to See If I Had Unlimited Funds:Blais v. Woog in the ancient, deadly art of bubble hockey. I hope Doug Woog remembers to keep his foot out of the bucket. Or in the bucket. Or in another bucket. Or whatever it is.

Controversial Play That a WCHA Official Will Probably Screw-Up: I've got no real complaints this week.

Cliche Arena Song of the Week: In Heaven There is No Beer. I'm fundamentally opposed to this song because I fully intend on out-living all of my friends.

Picks to Click
Last week: 1 goal, 1 assist, 35 saves 3 goals against, 1 loss

Forward: Ryan Jones, Miami
Defense: Mike Ratchuk, Michigan State
Goalie: Alex Stalock, Minnesota-Duluth

Pre/Post-Game Meal of the Week: Gyros. Dino's gyros if we're being Twin Cities-centric. I'm not really sure what part of the animal the gyro is, but it's delicious.

Arena Food of the Week: Dippin' Dots. Welcome to the ice cream of TOMORROW!.

Wisdom of Michael Scott: "There are four kinds of business: tourism, food service, railroads, and sales...and hospitals/manufacturing...and air travel.

Predictions For You Compulsive Gambling-Types That Have to Bet

Gambletron 2000's Pick of the Week: Blais 308 Woog 0

Smooth Jimmy Apollo's 52% Lock of the Week: Saturday night Miami 6 Alaska 1

The George Costanza Special(A prediction that is the exact opposite of every instinct and inclination I have): Minnesota sweeps North Dakota

WCH Weekend Preview

Thursday Night Pre-Game Movie: Miracle. I'm surprised this movie wasn't more popular than it was. It was very well done.

Absolutely true story: At a game last year, my girlfriend told me that she had twisted her ankle jumping up and down after a goal. I turned to her and said, 'Your ankle is a long way from your heart, candyass.'

Friday Afternoon Pre-Game Song: Chemical Halo by Chemlab. Ah, the sweet, sophisticated art of industrial rock. Chemlab is perhaps best remembered from their band poster, which is seen in numerous scenes of the movie 12 Monkeys, which is to say, remembered by me and a few Terry Gilliam film snobs.

Probably true story: Chemlab opened up for Nine Inch Nails on one of NIN's tours. While on tour, lead singer Jared Louche was so depressed that Trent Reznor put him on 24-hour suicide watch. That begs the obvious question, how poor does your outlook on life have to be before Trent Reznor is saying to you, 'Dude, cheer up, things aren't so bad."

Games I'd Want to See If I Had Unlimited Funds: North Dakota at Denver. This like the third time I've picked the Sioux for this. Which begs another obvious question: How sad is my outlook on life that even in my wildest fantasies where I'm insanely rich, I'm spending a bunch of time with North Dakotans?


Controversial Play That a WCHA Official Will Probably Screw-Up: I probably shouldn't have gone out to CCHA country last weekend because it provided a cruel tease of what things could be. A Minnesota forward interfered with a forechecker last weekend and was actually called for a penalty.

Anyway, if Derek Shepherd is officiating your game this weekend, CSTV's Elliot Olshansky has a handy list of insults to hurl his way, based on the Grey's Anatomy character, Dr. Derek Shepherd.

TOP FIVE THINGS I'D LIKE TO HEAR WCHA FANS YELL AT DEREK SHEPHERD

5. Come on Shepherd, you must be McDreaming!
4. [chanted] Meeeeeeeeeredith! Meeeeeeeeeredith!
3. Hey Shepherd, did you give yourself a lobotomy or something?
2. Come on, Shepherd, it's not brain surgery!

And the number one thing I'd like to hear WCHA fans yell at Derek Shepherd...

1. Hey Shepherd, we're not Meredith Grey. Stop screwing us!

Cliche Arena Song of the Week:
Hava Nagila. I guess not many college rinks play this, but it's one of the four songs in heavy rotation at Joe Louis Arena, which always seemed kind of strange to me.

Picks to Click
Last week: Delicious

Forward: Mick Marlin Berge, Minnesota State
Defenseman: Chad Langlais, Michigan
Goalie: Alex Kangas, Minnesota

Pre/Post-Game Meal of the Week: Wendy's Minnesota Wild Bacon Cheeseburger. I prefer my sports team food endorsements to come from the world of baseball, where it's a tad more believable. For example, the Cecil Fielder candy bar, or Minnesota Twins ice cream(which I can imagine Carlos Silva eating out of a spare batting helmet). But there's no way I can imagine a Wild player actually eating one of these things unless they somehow trade for Tyler Arnason. If you're brave enough, however, 25 cents from each burger purchased goes to Minnesota Hockey.


Arena Food of the Week: Hot dogs. Is it just me or does every arena have one stand that is pretty good, and one stand where the hot dogs taste like the bottom of your shoe?

Funny Joke that Somebody Else Wrote: In honor of my triumphant return to Mankato this weekend, I give you one of my all-time favorite lines:

"Mankato? That sounds like a gay vegetable." --Rainn Wilson.


Predictions For You Compulsive Gambling-Types That Have to Bet

Gambletron 2000's Pick of the Week: Friday night- Michigan Tech 437 Minnesota 0

Smooth Jimmy Apollo's 52% Lock of the Week: Saturday night- Notre Dame 3 Nebraska-Omaha 2

The George Costanza Special(A prediction that is the exact opposite of every instinct and inclination I have): Michigan State sweeps Lake Superior

WCH Weekend Preview

Thursday Night Pre-Game Movie: Beowulf. I am so sick of Hollywood remaking every old movie or book they can get their hands on. It's nice to finally see them come up with an original idea for a film.

Friday Afternoon Pre-Game Song: Cum on Feel the Noize by Slade. Last week, I mentioned the Quiet Riot version of this song and, in what is possibly my favorite comment ever, reader RR pointed out that rock legends Slade song the original version. A quick YouTube search produced the most beautiful video I've ever seen. Slade reminds me of a simpler time, back when it was all about the music...and dressing yourself up with as many ridiculous affectations as possible.


Games I'd Want to See If I Had Unlimited Funds: All of four of the Showcase games involving Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, and Michigan State should be pretty entertaining, and luckily enough, I'll be at two of them.

Controversial Play That a WCHA Official Will Probably Screw-Up: A combination of holiday spirit, and the fact WCHA refs will have half as many opportunities to screw up as a normal week leads to me to keep this section blank.

Cliche Arena Song of the Week: "Eye of the Tiger" What else needs to be said? The category was created for Eye of the Tiger.

Picks to Click
Last week: 2 goals, 2 assists, 2 goals against, 2 wins

Turkey: White Meat
Stuffing: Traditional Sage
Pie: Pumpkin


Arena Food of the Week: Smuggled in leftovers. Most arenas have some sort of policy about not bringing in outside food, but there has to be at least 5 places on your person that you can stash your delicious holiday leftovers(Actually, 6 places if you're creative, 7 if you've got a high tolerance for pain).

Funny Joke that Somebody Else Wrote: I usually end up butchering these jokes by typing them out, so I'll go the YouTube route again. I don't know why, but this set from Matt Fulchiron is one of my favorites.


Predictions For You Compulsive Gambling-Types That Have to Bet
Gambletron 2000's Pick of the Week: Friday night-Michigan State 349 Minnesota 0

Smooth Jimmy Apollo's 52% Lock of the Week: Saturday night- Nebraska-Omaha 4 Alaska 1

The George Costanza Special(A prediction that is the exact opposite of every instinct and inclination I have): Minnesota-Duluth sweeps North Dakota.

WCH Weekend Preview

Thursday Night Pre-Game Movie: Anything but Employee of the Month. Louis CK never starred in an awful, awful movie that didn't need to be made. Why couldn't Dane Cook have copied that from him too?

Friday Afternoon Pre-Game Song: "Shame" by Stabbing Westward. Technically, Stabbing Westward is known more these days for the song "Save Yourself" which is played in the trailer of every action movie, but I always liked "Shame" better.


Games I'd Want to See If I Had Unlimited Funds: Miami at Michigan State. Both teams have an outstanding record, but haven't really been tested yet. This weekend should help tell us which of these teams are for real.

Controversial Play That a WCHA Official Will Probably Screw-Up: Something that is clearly explained in the NCAA's Points of Emphasis memo.


Cliche Arena Song of the Week: "Come on Feel the Noize" by Quiet Riot. Yes, they actually spelled 'noise' like that. My brother once played in a high school hockey game where this was the only song they played at every stoppage of play.

Picks to Click
Last week: 1 goal, 0 assists, 1 save, 3 goals against, one loss. I bet that one save was freakin' awesome though.

Forward: Blake Wheeler
Defenseman: Jack Hillen
Goalie: Jordan Pearce

Arena Food of the Week:Popcorn. I know this is a popular concession, because any time I'm at a hockey rink, someone has to walk up right behind me and eat some in my ear. I swear it's like I have a sign on my back or something.

Injury Report
Ryan Stoa-Minnesota-Out for year with knee injury
Zach Pelletier-Ohio State-Out for year with leg injury
Jake Wilkens-Michigan Tech-Out with leg injury
Evan Oberg-Minnesota-Duluth-Out with leg injury
Louie Caporusso-Michigan-Out with knee injury
Michael Lee-Teslak-Questionable with back injury
Blake Friesen-Minnesota State-Questionable with undisclosed injury
Mike Testwuide-Colorado College-Questionable with ankle injury
Mike Howe-Minnesota-Out with concussion
Juha Uotila-Nebraska-Omaha-Questionable due to academics
Bucky Badger-Wisconsin-Questionable with leg injury

Predictions For You Compulsive Gambling-Types That Have to Bet


Gambletron 2000's Pick of the Week: Friday night-Alaska-Anchorage 213 Minnesota 0

Smooth Jimmy Apollo's 52% Lock of the Week: Friday Night-Notre Dame 4 Western Michigan 2

The George Costanza Special(A prediction that is the exact opposite of every instinct and inclination I have): Ferris State sweeps Nebraska-Omaha

You Have One Day, Bucky

Apparently in addition to North Dakota's fight with Wisconsin on Saturday night, there was a bit of violence directed towards Wisconsin's mascot.

Before the game on Saturday, North Dakota defenseman Joe Finley slashed Bucky Badger in the shin, as Bucky was trying to leave the ice.

WCHA commissioner Bruce McLeod reviewed tape of the incident, and stated that Finely will have to write an apology letter to David Blanchard, who wears the vaunted Badger costume.

First off, I think it would have been hilarious if, as on the TV show "Cavemen", the person inside the mascot costume ended up being female. (I've referenced some ridiculous stuff on here, but I've never been more embarassed than right now, referencing "Cavemen")

Second, I think Finley should skip the apology letter, and instead make a Michael Scott-esque apology video. Having studied them, I think there are three main keys:

1. Make sure it is directed by a woman. These things require a woman's touch.

2. Do not let them make you an escapegoat.

3. And I cannot stress this enough: make sure you give them an ultimatum. They always give an ultimatum in the movies.

WCH Weekend Preview

Thursday Night Pre-Game Movie: The Deer Hunter. This would have been a lot more clever last week when deer hunting season began. What do you call people who are really smart and witty, but it takes them like a week to come up with it. Oh yeah: dumb. Anyway, there's an all-star cast in this film with Robert DeNiro, Christopher Walken, Meryl Streep, and it was the last movie Fredo Corleone did before he died of bone cancer.

Friday Afternoon Pre-Game Song: "Shipping Off to Boston" by the Dropkick Murphys. Again, much more clever if I had come up with this the week North Dakota was actually playing in Boston. Again: dumb. But I drew a blank this week. It was this or that song from the iPhone commerical. Anyway, you may remember this tune from the movie The Departed, which I watch on a near-weekly basis.

Games I'd Want to See If I Had Unlimited Funds Minnesota vs. Minnesota State. The first game at the "Alltel Wireless Center" should draw one of the bigger crowds in arena history on Friday night. It's going to be a great big party with everyone except Jon Campion invited.

Controversial Play That a WCHA Official Will Probably Screw-Up If last year's MSU/UM series is any indication: all of them.

Cliche Arena Song of the Week: Saturday Night's Alright(For Fighting), Elton John or Nickelback. Who could have ever guessed that an Elton John song would be covered by a band more queer than Elton John? Random meaningless trivia, both Nickelback and Elton John are huge hockey fans.

Picks to Click
Last week: Both teams played hard.

Forward: Kevin Porter, Michigan
Defenseman: Drew Dobson, Michigan Tech
Goalie: Reid Ellingson, Northern Michigan

Arena Food of the Week:Cinnamon-roasted Almonds. Roasted almonds are the Sirens of the hockey culinary world. The sweet cinnamon smell is the most delightful smell in any arena, and draws in hockey-goers from all over, and yet I don't think I've ever seen someone eat more than four almonds before they're sick of them.

Pre/Post-Game Meal of the Week: Gigantic Culver's, Edgerton, Wisconsin. I've never actually confirmed that this is the largest fast-food restaurant in the country, but if it isn't, we, as a society, have a very serious problem. Imagine seating at your favorite fast-food restaurant and then double it. This Culver's has two rooms like that, and I can't figure out why, other than that people from Wisconsin hear 'butter' and 'burger' together and just go nuts.

Injury Report
Ryan Stoa-Minnesota-Out for year with knee injury
Zach Pelletier-Ohio State-Out for year with leg injury
Evan Oberg-Minnesota-Duluth-Out with leg injury
Bryan Hogan-Michigan-Questionable due to illness
Nathan Davis-Miami-Questionable with upper body injury
Ben Youds-Minnesota State-Questionable with lower body injury
Juha Uotila-Nebraska-Omaha-Questionable due to academics
Nils Backstrom-Alaska-Anchorage-Questionable with leg injury
Brad Malone-North Dakota-Quiestionable with shoulder injury
Nick Fanto-Nebraska-Omaha-Likely to return from injury
Brandon Scero-Nebraska-Omaha-Likely to return from injury

Funny Joke That Someone Else Wrote:"I've been kind of sad lately, ever since I lost my miniature pet hamster, Bonita. Well actually, she didn't really die. I took her back to the pet store. But she's dead to me." --Duluth's Maria Bamford

Predictions For You Compulsive Gambling-Types That Have to Bet


Gambletron 2000's Pick of the Week: Friday night-Minnesota State 241 Minnesota 0

Smooth Jimmy Apollo's 52% Lock of the Week: Saturday Night: Lake Superior 2 Wayne State 1

The George Costanza Special(A prediction that is the exact opposite of every instinct and inclination I have): St. Cloud sweeps Michigan Tech

WCH Weekend Preview

Thursday Night Pre-Game Movie Rob Roy. This movie came out around the same time as Braveheart, but what I think makes it better than Braveheart is the absolutely awesome performance by Tim Roth as the bad guy. I know I said Chong Li was the greatest villain ever two weeks ago, but Archibald Cunningham could give him a run for his money.

Incidentally, I was trying to figure out why Tim Roth wasn't more famous, and learned that he apparently turned down the role of Severus Snape in the Harry Potter movies to shoot the terrible remake of Planet of the Apes. That sucks because he would have been way, way better than Alan Rickman for that role.

Friday Afternoon Pre-Game Song: "Stranglehold" by Ted Nugent. One of the greatest opening guitar riffs ever. But more importantly, does anyone remember Ted Nugent's short-lived reality TV show "Surviving Nugent"? It was easily the greatest reality television show I've ever seen. There were only two seasons, not because the show stopped being good, but because odds were fairly strong that somebody would have died had they shot another season. Basically, it was 8 contestants on Ted Nugent's compound doing the most ridiculous, degrading, dangerous things you can imagine, and then arbitrarily being thrown off the show by Ted. It's easy to see how that formula would be successful, but you had to see it in practice to fully appreciate the greatness.

By the way, the worst reality televsion show of all-time? "Shot at Love with Tila Tequila". Tila Tequila was once a loser on "Surviving Nugent".

Games I'd Want to See If I Had Unlimited Funds: Ferris State at Ohio State. What? I can't pick North Dakota or Colorado College every week. Don't ask, it's a union thing.

Controversial Play That a WCHA Official Will Probably Screw-Up: I haven't seen much to complain about from WCHA officials so far this year, so I'll suspend my pick for this week.

Cliche Arena Song of the Week: "Welcome to the Jungle" by Guns N' Roses. I always wondered why, after GNR broke up, Axl Rose decided to stay in Los Angeles and live the life of a washed-up musician, when he could have moved to St. Cloud and been revered as a god.

Picks to Click
Last week: 2 goals, 1 assist, 1 win, 1 loss .888 save percentage

Forward: Garrett Roe, St. Cloud
Defenseman: Alec Martinez, Miami
Goalie: Riley Gill, Western Michigan

Arena Food of the Week: Nachos. If it's classy enough for Beavis and Butthead, it's more than classy enough for you.

Pre/Post-Game Meal of the WeekWhite Castle. I have the problem that I think the burgers are delicious, but I feel like I'm going to die after I'm done eating them. Much like the game of hockey, eating there is all about sacrifice and commitment.

Injury Report
Ryan Stoa-Minnesota-Out for year with knee injury
Zach Pelletier-Ohio State-Out for year with leg injury
Nils Backstrom-Alaska-Anchorage-Out with leg injury
Luke Beaverson-Alaska-Anchorage-Questionable with ankle injury
Bryan Hogan-Michigan-Questionable due to illness
Nathan Davis-Miami-Questionable with upper body injury
Juha Uotila-Nebraska-Omaha-Questionable due to academics
Josh Engel-Wisconsin-Out with shoulder injury
Brad Malone-North Dakota-Out with shoulder injury
Mike Testwuide-Colorado College-Out with illness

Funny Joke that Someone Else Wrote: "I wanna be a race car passenger. Just a guy that bugs the driver. 'Say man, can I turn on the radio? You should slow down. Why we gotta keep going in circles? Man, you really like Tide.'" --Mitch Hedberg

Predictions for You Compulsive Gambling-Types that Have to Bet

Gambletron 2000's Pick of the Week: Sunday night-Denver 957 Minnesota 0

Smooth Jimmy Apollo's 52% Lock of the Week: Friday night-Michigan State 3 Alaska 1

The George Costanza Special(A prediction that is the exact opposite of every instinct and inclination I have): Northern Michigan sweeps Miami

WCH Weekend Preview

Thursday Night Pre-Game Movie:Labyrinth. A Jim Henson movie? With singing? That was the basis for Harry Potter? Yeah, that's right. I ask you, what is cooler than David Bowie? Nothing, that's what. Except for evil Bowie juggling a crystal ball.

Friday Afternoon Pre-Game Song: 'Til I Collapse by Eminem. An appropriate song before a hockey game. Or before your post-game drinking.

Game I'd Want to See If I Had Unlimited Funds: Colorado College at New Hampshire. Colorado College looked like they were for real last weekend when they earned a big sweep over Minnesota, while New Hampshire is one of the strongest teams in the east. This isn't just a great game. It's like watching Anthony Bourdain fight Dr. House.

Controversial Play That a WCHA Official Will Probably Screw-Up: Blown icing call that leads to a critical goal.

Cliche Arena Song of the Week: The Hockey Song by Stompin' Tom Connors. In 2004, Stompin' Tom was voted the 13th greatest Canadian, beating out other Canadian musicians like Shania Twain(19th), Celine Dion(27th), Avril Lavigne(40th), Bryan Adams(90th), and Anne Murray(95th). Proof that God exists, and really hates plywood.

Picks to Click
Last week: 2 goals, 3 assists, 2 wins, 92% save percentage

Forward-Justin Mercier, Miami
Defense-Kyle Lawson, Notre Dame
Goalie-Peter Mannino, Denver

Arena Food of the Week: Hot chocolate. Hot chocolate is a very underrated concession, especially if you're a pansy like me that doesn't really care for coffee. One part hot water, one part cheap, gross, sugary mix. That combo usually leads to hot chocolate being pretty cheap too. The truly brave can attempt to drink the chocolatey sludge that forms on the bottom of the cup at the end.

Pre/Post-Game Meal of the Week: Chicken burrito from Burrito-Loco Dinkytown, Minneapolis, Minnesota. I think three different types of sour cream is a little too cutesy, and BBQ chicken in a burrito doesn't seem right, but you have to try pretty hard to screw up a burrito.

Injury Report
(Note: players listed as questionable didn't play last weekend due to injury, and I haven't heard any new information on their status.)
Ryan Stoa-Minnesota-Out with knee injury(Out for year)
Brad Malone-North Dakota-Out with shoulder injury
Zach Pelletier-Ohio State-Out with leg injury(Out for year)
Bryan Hogan-Michigan-Out with illness
Jimmy Kilpatrick-Colorado College-Out with hip injury
Mike Louwerse-Minnesota State-Out with groin injury
Jason Wiley-Minnesota State-Questionable with undisclosed injury
Juha Uotila-Nebraska-Omaha-Out due to academics
Mark Olver-Northern Michigan-Questionable with concussion
Nathan Davis-Miami-Questionable with upper body injury

Funny Joke that Somebody Else Wrote: "My sister has multiple personality disorder, and there's nothing funny about that. But one time, she called me, and my caller ID exploded." --Zach Galifianakis


Predictions For You Compulsive Gambling-Types That Have to Bet:

Gambletron 2000's Pick of the Week: Thursday night- Ohio State 164 Minnesota 0

Smooth Jimmy Apollo's 52% Lock of the Week: Friday night- Clarkson 4 Lake Superior 1

The George Costanza Special(A prediction that is the exact opposite of every instinct and inclination I have): Michigan Tech sweeps North Dakota

WCH Weekend Preview

I'm not really a huge NFL fan, but I do always enjoy reading Big Daddy Drew's NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo every week. So I figured I'd steal the format for my own weekly college hockey preview.

Thursday Night Pre-Weekend Movie: Bloodsport. Greatest fighting movie ever. Bolo Yeung totally should have won an Oscar for his portrayal of Chong Li. He's easily the greatest villain in any movie ever. This movie will both pump you up for a hockey game, and make you want to kick somebody in the face. Both could come in handy over the weekend.

Friday Afternoon Pre-Game Song: "Maria" by Rage Against the Machine. As far as experiments go, I'd put "Chris Cornell with RATM" right up there with "Tuskegee". I like to remember the good old days before Rage broke my heart.

Game I'd Want to See If I Had Unlimited Funds: Denver at Notre Dame. I strongly believe at least one of these two teams will be in the Frozen Four this year.

Controversial Play that a WCHA Official Will Probably Screw Up: I'm going to have to go with some sort of a goal-crease violation. Picking "weak checking-from-behind call" seems way too obvious.

Picks to Click:
Forward-Jeff LoVecchio, Western Michigan
Defense-Matt Stephenson, St. Cloud
Goalie-Jeff Lerg, Michigan State

Cliche Arena Song of the Week: Pinball Wizard. I think it's federal law that every pep band must play this song at least once per game.

Pre/Post-Game Meal of the Week: Runza sandwich, Omaha, Nebraska. Usually I'd say stuffing beef into something before stuffing it into myself is just a wasted step, but apparently the bread is pretty good.

Injury Front:
Ryan Stoa-Minnesota-Out with knee injury
Jimmy Kilpatrick-Colorado College-Out with shoulder injury
Josh Engel-Wisconsin-Out with shoulder injury
Jason Wiley-Minnesota State-Out with undisclosed injury
Jake Wilkens-Michigan Tech-Out with undisclosed injury
Brock Bradford-Boston College-Out with arm injury
Brett Motherwell-Boston College-Suspended
Brian O'Hanley-Boston College-Suspended
Rhett Rakhshani-Denver-Will play after suffering a concussion two weeks ago

Funny Joke That Somebody Else Wrote: "I'm in a weird situation because I like rainbows, but I'm not gay. So I wear a rainbow on my shirt, but under it, I have to write 'not gay'. But I'm not against gay people, so under that, I have to write 'but supportive'. I just think it's weird that one group took refracted light. That's pretty greedy, gays. --Demetri Martin

Predictions For You Compulsive Gambling-Types That Have to Bet

Gambletron 2000's Pick of the Week: Saturday Night- Colorado College 347 Minnesota 0

Smooth Jimmy Apollo's 52% Lock of the Week: Friday night- Wisconsin 3 Robert Morris 1

The George Costanza Special(A prediction that is the exact opposite of every instinct and inclination I have): Minnesota-Duluth sweeps St. Cloud

Why Can't This Happen in College Hockey?

(Slooooooooow news day filler. FYI)

Earlier this week, we were treated to a delightful story about two Iowa football players stealing a credit card and making tons of illegal purchases, as well as one of the funnier headlines I've seen in a while.

The key to any good news story though is the informative follow-up story. That came courtesy of The Hawkeye Compulsion, who found out that frequent Facebookers really should have seen this coming.

(Side Story 1: Despite his t-shirt's claim of "Life's a Hustle in the D," I'd like to point out that I made two trips down one of the more scenic portions of Michigan Avenue in Detroit while I was home in Michigan a couple weeks ago, and I saw very little hustle out of the citizens of said area.)

I'll ignore obvious questions like, "Why steal and wave around a couple hundred bucks when, at least in Douglas' case, he was a couple years from making at least 100 times that much in the NFL?" and "Who looks at Adam "Pacman" Jones and says 'Yeah, that is a wise career path'"?

(Side Story 2: I implored Seattle Mariners outfielder Adam Jones to "make it rain" with a batting practice ball last night. I was mostly ignored.)

That brings us to college hockey. I can't help but feel that college hockey is lagging behind in these types of shenanigans. Sure, there have been moments; those UNO players in the casino, the BC guys getting busted for credit card fraud, Brandon Bochenski trying to print his own money. But for the most part, when it comes to scandals and Facebook embarassment, it's the same rote stuff. Jeff Frazee sipping Long Islands at Blarney's, Jonathan Toews poor form on the beer bong, yadda, yadda, yadda. Been there, done that.

That's why I'm calling for college hockey to start raising the bar a little bit. Most of the stars in college hockey have been drafted and are just a couple months away from signing that big contract. It's a perfect opportunity to get a little loose with the cash in the stupidest of possible fashions. Or I'm sure we'd all love it if a picture popped up on Facebook of a guy wearing a shirt that says, "Life's a Hustle in the E(dina)" I don't think it's too much to ask.

I don't think I'm asking too much here. It's a long offseason, and we need to be entertained.

Hot Recruiting Tip

(Props to Deadspin for the story. Apologies to you, the reader. It's a fairly slow news day and I haven't used the whimsy tag in months.)

It turns out that Barry Bonds didn't get so strong from taking steroids. He just has an awesome off-season training program: playing hockey.

Apparently Bonds and his family like to hang out at the rink with Alan Thicke. But the most stunning revelation here is this quote from Bonds:

Funny thing, I'd never seen my son skate, and he beat all of us.

If he's better than the best man at Wayne Gretzky's wedding, you know he's got game. Plus, his name is Nikolai, which kind of sounds Russian. If Kurt and Goldie's kid can play for Alabama-Huntsville, how long until colleges start recruiting the younger Bonds, who is 17? Hopefully it's soon.

Your Pain Amuses Me

Brett Motherwell was done using this stick anyway.

As someone who used to coach tennis, I must say that the technique is nearly flawless.